Religion Vs. Reality

For the past 3 years I have been on a spiritual path leading me away from any and all religion of which I was raised on. It's actually kind of a scary thing to turn your back on something you've been taught your whole life and embrace something your family deeply disapproves of. But the fact is, once you start questioning religion from an "honest to God" point of view, it's extremely hard to go back to religion. It's like an awakening and you don't want to go back to sleep. The problem I have with it is that it's very lonely on this end of it. Yes, I still believe in God with every molecule of my body, mind, and soul, but I do not believe in religion. I believe God exists in us, through us, and all around us. I also believe we are God. I think my religious family and friends would agree with this to some extent, but tell them "I am god", and they call you a blasphemer. They see only half the picture and trying to explain it to them seems to be useless because to them, the very topic is blasphemous.

My entire family and many of my friends are religious people and they are wonderful, sweet, loving people so there is nothing wrong with them following whatever religion they feel necessary. I have to admit that I do have a hard time with their constant attempts to "save me". Here is what I think is sweet, they love me and they want me to be happy eternally with them (in their perspective) and the only way is to believe that God is going to damn me to hell if i don't follow their religion so they want me to follow it. These things have been hard-coded in their head for decades and decades, three times a week, so it's hard to even bring it up without getting judged and ridiculed for it...it's easier sometimes to let them think you believe what they do, which doesn't feel good to me but it is what it is.

5 Years ago, i was the most devout Christian do-gooder, girl next door type you would ever meet so i know the Christian views. I remember all those questions people have as a religious-type that are always unanswered by the elders as "because we're christian and that's how we do it" or "that's just way it is" or "don't question it or there will be consequences by god" I also have lived in reality for the past 3 years and reality has answers that are not fairy tale, mythological, or out-dated made up speeches that have been passed down from generation to generation and changed along the way to fit into your situation perfectly and make you feel guilty for the rest of your life.

The reality: Humans are not here to live an unhappy life, do what makes you truly, "honest to god" happy and the only way to know exactly what makes you honest to God happy is to go to your soul (your inner God)to find that out, not your mind. For example, if you think it will make you happy to cheat on your wife or husband...go inside and ask yourself. Will this make me truly honest to god happy? Your mind and body may tell you yes, but your soul may tell you something different. Why? Maybe because it is not who you are to hurt your spouse, or live with the guilt, or hide something from him or her. However, your soul may tell you yes. Shocker coming from me, I know! Or most importantly, your soul doesn't seek worldly pleasures. Here's why your soul may say yes: Because it is "who you are" and your soul wants you to experience who you really are (God) and the only way to do this is to have have experiences to bring you closer to that realization. In some cases, cheating on your husband/wife may bring you closer to the realization of who you are more than any other experience and knowing exactly who you really are and experiencing it is the only pathway to peace and happiness (heaven).

Let me tell you a personal life experience of mine. I got married at 22 to my now ex-husband that told me he wanted to cheat on me 4 months after we got married with a girl he met from work. Gutsy he was! I was at the point in my life when i was a devout church-going christian that thought this is the worst thing you could ever do to someone (I still have an opinion about it but that doesn't matter here). He didn't do it, but he asked for a divorce instead. Which I refused to give to him until he did the act due to my religious reasons. Eventually he did, I gave him his divorce and he eventually married this girl and had a baby with her. I now truly believe they are happy and perfect for each other and I don't mean it in an offensive or sarcastic way either. Don't think for a second this was easily realized because I had nearly made myself crazy over it for years. It wasn't until after I left religion that I realized how much I admired him for doing what he did regardless of the religious judgemental attitudes and condemnations he got from me and just about everyone he and I knew. Yes, I admire him for cheating on me! Because he did whatever it took to make himself Honest to God happy and he went inward to do it. He didn't listen to anyone, just his inner truth to live the life he needed to experience. He knew what he had to do to expireience "who he really is" and now we are both happier and closer to the realization of "who we are" as individuals so I thank God that he followed his heart and soul. To me, the most admirable characteristic anyone can have is follwoing and living ones own truth.

Peace. :)