The Ihop Pineapple Stare-down

Halp! Ihop is under attack by ginormous paper pineapples! These giant paper pineapples are vicious and randomly placed in corners, strung from ceilings, hovering over name tags, and even staring you down as you look at your menu. Not to mention that I now have reason to believe these vicious paper pineapples are the reason their pancakes now taste like pineapple poo. I was temped to take this one hostage as I was standing at the cash register but I can see it now--me with this giant paper pineapple in my lap in a high speed chase with the pineapple police. Probably not a good way to start out a saturday morning.

Tattoos

Call me a tree huggin' hippie but it disturbs me that people tattoo trees. I'm honestly not one of those "green" types nor the "save the planet" types, but why walk up to something living and deliberately scar it for no good purpose? Poor little tree, I actually want to hug it...

Speaking of tattoos--I think i want one on my booty. Just a tiny one somewhere that nobody can see. It can be my little secret! :-) I've been looking for ideas for a while but so far all I can find are fairies with boobs, hearts with boobs, dragons with boobs, and ladybugs with boobs. Obviously men came up with these designs but did they ever consider someone that already has BOOBS would want a tattoo?? Maybe I should get a ladybug with a penis...